Closure

I'm leaving for China for two weeks on Friday, and then three weeks after that, I'm set to move to Melbourne in early-mid October (no date set, just asap after the 4th October). I felt relieved and excited about going to China because it would be two weeks away from work, but lately, the feeling of trying to create closure with Sydney friends and with mending my health has compounded, especially today with seeing my endo for the second last time ever after having him treat me through good times and bad for the past eight-and-a-half years. I felt like the appointment this afternoon was one of the best I ever had with him - he was on time, we chatted a bit about personal things (me moving and going back to study, him talking about going to medical school with Dr. Karl and also disappearing off the face of the earth for one week every year to avoid naggy GPs), and then also talked a bit about my iron and suspected absorption problem which he strongly advised me to check out sooner rather than later. I only have one appointment left with him and my thyroid levels have been just in the okay for the past few appointments, so not too bad, but not great. I definitely am feeling a similar feeling to the weeks leading up to my departure for Europe last year - sentimental, rushed, regretful.


Here are some things I wanted to have done before I move:

• clear out wardrobe and sell things on ebay
• get my Ps
• have an endoscopy
• have another iron infusion
• have a goodbye/birthday party
• have B come to Sydney and meet my fam and friends
• make visiting Sydney art galleries a regular thing
• call Centrelink and tell them I cancelled my claim
• sell all my Europe zines

Regretful that I didn't start on these things sooner, rushed that I have only a few days and then a few weeks to do what I can of this incomplete list, sentimental because I am sure I will miss a lot about Sydney. These few weeks will go by so quickly and I feel like I'm desperately hanging on to what I have left. Now that the moving date is drawing nearer, I am actually finding that I can less and less picture what my living situation will be like in two months and at the beginning of next year. Maybe I am just starting to become overwhelmed by how far away I am from the sense of closure that I need. I think I just need to take it one step at a time.